


(I Wonder If) You Hurt Like Me

by seungsols



Series: Red Roses, Broken Hearts [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-20
Updated: 2015-11-20
Packaged: 2018-05-02 12:26:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5248226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seungsols/pseuds/seungsols
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hansol and Seungkwan broke up two months ago but they’re still hung up on each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	(I Wonder If) You Hurt Like Me

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the song by 2AM.

School was dismissed as the students packed their bags and filed out of the room.

It’s only been two months, but it was a habit for Hansol to wait outside of Seungkwan’s room and walk with him back home.

Oh, he says to himself. He forgot, they weren’t as close anymore.

It’s difficult. The two were so close, closer than anyone they’ve ever met or heard of, and everyone knew they were always with each other wherever they went.

The fact that they gave a relationship a try was a huge and risky jump for them, especially since they’ve been friends for such a long time, but they were willing to risk it.

A few months in and things were going smoothly. In fact, one would say that they grew a bit closer than before. Their first hug was cute and quick, but they began to make it a part of their greeting and farewell routine. Sometimes, Hansol hugged Seungkwan from behind as a surprise or whenever one of them was feeling sad. And it always worked.

The moment they shared their first kiss was cute as well. Seungkwan just went for it when they were studying history together in the library. They had to remain quiet, so Hansol looked up at Seungkwan with a surprised, quiet, red face. Seungkwan thought he would get mad, but Hansol responded back with another kiss.

Six months passed by before they said those three words to each other. Hansol was the first one to say it. It took Seungkwan four more days to build up the courage to say it back, which Hansol didn’t mind at all. Hansol was always a patient one.

Eight months passed and they entered a new school year. They had more classes together, which was to their favour, meaning they had more reasons to study and hang out afterwards together. But Seungkwan was heavily involved in the music department while Hansol was with the science department.

–

That’s when things started to go down hill.

White day was around the corner, and Seungkwan had already planned something special for Hansol. That’s why he was surprised to hear that Hansol already had plans that day and couldn’t hang out with Seungkwan.

It was extremely weird. Hansol  _always_  made time for Seungkwan, especially when it came to days like this. He brushed it off though, knowing that Hansol was still his and he could forgive one little thing like this.

But the day Hansol wanted to make it up to him was the day Seungkwan was unable to join him. Oh, Hansol thought. He totally felt what Seungkwan had felt now. He got it now, the feeling of sadness just because someone you loved didn’t have time for you.

However, one weekend, their schedules lined up perfectly and they were able to spend a whole day together. It was well needed. They laughed, walked around, and had a fun time like they used to always have when they first started dating. They realized they did still like each other. Scratch that, love each other.

And for the most part, their relationship stayed like that.

–

Around the time the leaves began to change, so did their relationship.

It was an agonizingly slow change, but it led to the end of something that lasted almost two years.

They stopped talking. They stopped sitting next to each other in class during free time and stopped walking each other home. Text messages and calls weren’t sent from either party. Everyday, they became heavily involved with their clubs so they could get their minds off of it.

Seungkwan cried himself to sleep at least once a night for three weeks because of it. Why did his heart hurt so much? Was it because he poured himself into this relationship, into Hansol, for so long that he feels like he lost a part of him? He no longer felt like himself. What was he without him?

Hansol couldn’t even sleep because all he kept thinking about was Seungkwan. He cried once or twice, but not as long or often as Seungkwan. He knew Seungkwan was a crier. Heck, when he first said he loved him, Seungkwan was teary eyed already. Hansol just pulled him in for a hug when he cried though. Hansol always knew how to help Seungkwan when he cried. Who was helping him now though? Was there anyone to help him?

Hansol met Lee Chan in science club. At first, they were a bit quiet with each other, until they figured they had a few common interests together.

Chan loved to dance and was just as passionate about music as Hansol was. Hansol had a few friends, but he’s never been as close to someone as he was with Seungkwan. Trying to be close to Chan outside of school was hard and foreign to him. But he tried, just to get his mind off of Seungkwan.

Seungkwan met a lot of older people in the music department. Lee Jihoon, a student who planned on becoming a musician when he graduates, showed him a lot about singing and composing. It was really fascinating, nobody’s really shared their love of music with him except Hansol. This was different, but he liked it.

It wasn’t long until their paths crossed once again. 

Chan was friends with a lot of people in the music department, Hansol learned, and introduced him to Jihoon who was writing a song for Chan to dance to. Chan’s other music friend, Soonyoung, was the main choreographer.

Soonyoung was best friends with Seokmin, a talented singer who quickly befriended Seungkwan and invited him to the music room often to join them in jam sessions.

One afternoon, Hansol was invited to the music department as Chan wanted to show his friend one of the latest projects for the school talent show.

Seungkwan was already in the room with Seokmin and Soonyoung who were discussing the game plan when he heard a familiar voice at the doorway that made his heart race.

He looked up and their eyes locked on each other for a good few seconds until Chan pulled Hansol in to introduce him to his friends.

The other students weren’t in their class last year, so they didn’t know how close Hansol and Seungkwan used to be. Saying hello to each other was awkward for the two of them, but the others didn’t catch onto it, probably thinking they were just shy.

It wasn’t long until Hansol shot Seungkwan a text message. For the first time in a long time, Seungkwan reached for his phone and had a small smile on his face.

They texted until they both passed out on their beds but quickly texted when they first woke up. This continued for about two weeks. Both of them were happy to finally be talking to each other, but they would never admit it. In fact, their conversations were rather bland compared to what they usually talk about.

–

February reached and the two had just started talking to each other in person. It was hard for both of them. Seungkwan had to restrain himself from wanting to hold Hansol’s hand when they walked around school together. Hansol pulled himself together whenever he had the urge to run up to Seungkwan and pull him in for a hug.

This was also a very special month for Hansol. His birthday was coming up soon. Seungkwan, every year ever since they’ve known each other, always managed to surprise him with a special gift. The year before, he gave him that limited edition snapback that he’s been eyeing for months until it went on sale. Seungkwan saved up everything just to buy it. The year before that, he snuck two hundred chocolate bars into Hansol’s house and scattered it around his room as a cute joke.

It was the first birthday of Hansol’s that the two weren’t close, but that didn’t stop Seungkwan. Maybe giving him something would mean that they could go back to normal. Not necessarily dating, but somewhere where they could at least be friends again.

Hansol, Seungkwan learned, was actually more of a words person rather than a gift person. A letter is what Seungkwan settled with.

He had no idea what he was to write, so he just wrote what came to his mind. He spilled his heart out. Seungkwan wrote everything that he’s been feeling from the day they broke up until now. He still loved Hansol with all of his heart. He wanted to take care of Hansol and stay with him for the rest of his life, even if that meant that they could only be friends.

After writing, and a few tears, he folded it and put it into a box. Just for fun, he added a small bar of Hansol’s favourite chocolate.

It was still cold outside, and it looked like it was about to snow, but Seungkwan needed to deliver this letter to Hansol’s house.

However, when he turned the corner to Hansol’s, he saw Chan waiting right outside. He hid behind the nearest tree to observe what was happening. Chan was laughing as he pulled Hansol by his wrist. Hansol then pulled Chan for a hug as he spun the younger one around like he used to do with Seungkwan.

At the sight of Hansol with the other, Seungkwan felt his heart drop. He paused right where he was as he tightened the grip on the box in his hands.

Stupid, he thought to himself. He was stupid. What he was doing was stupid. There was no point anymore. It was stupid. Just stupid.

“Happy birthday,” Seungkwan muttered under his breath. He turned back around and began walking back home. Every step made his heart sink deeper and deeper. He tried to hold back his tears as the snow began to lightly fall onto the ground.


End file.
